while we were both in deep fear and anger at the state of things™ a few months ago, a friend here at the institute, Sam, asked if I would be open to recording an episode of voices of esalen loosely around gender. I and Abigail/Bo, one of my down to the ground absolute nearest and dearest, had a tender talk guided by Sam’s excellent questions and curiosity.

What you don’t get over the audio is Bo and I at times making funny faces at each other, offering each other the microphone, cheering each other on, and at other times holding hands, gripping tightly and making little moon shaped nail indentations as one or both (or all three of us) cried, the relief and the fear rising and falling as we were talking about our own personal journeys as well as a bit about the current national treatment of gender.

It felt right and important to do this. I was and am open to not doing it perfectly. Something I said in this interview is that the greatest predictor statistically of whether someone will act on behalf of a trans person is whether or not they know one, and if you don’t think you know one - you know me.

Hi, I’m Sawyer. I’m Sarah. I’m non-binary and I love you.

I’ll be back to writing in this space soon (I’m in my final finals week of my belated BA!), but for now, listen to this wherever podcasts happen for you, and let me know what you think? xoxo